Our resident corporate Agony Uncle, CEO Ken Cheng, tackles business challenges – so you don’t have to.
Dear Ken Cheng,
One of my employees keeps consistently turning up late by a few minutes every day. It doesn’t seem like enough to fire him, but I’m struggling at finding a punishment that works.
– Wanda, Branch Manager, Swindon
Ken Cheng:
Lateness is the scourge that plagues every office. It is the modern day equivalent to the black death and the Spanish flu. It is deadly if unchecked, and you must eradicate it before it spreads to the other employees.
I had a similar employee who was the bane of my existence. Let’s call him Viktor. He would turn consistently late, and I tried to play to his humanity and said that my feelings were really hurt by his lateness. He took my words and made a meme of them and shared it around the office.
Months later, he invited many from the office to his wedding. It was time to show him how cruel lateness can be. I turned up 45 minutes to the ceremony and made sure to make a big scene getting to my seat. Both Viktor and his bride were able to ignore it though, frustratingly. I decided to let things go and not ruin their perfect day.
Later at the dinner, his bride began choking on a piece of steak. Viktor panicked, and asked if anyone knew the Heimlich maneuver. I did.
I did not say anything. Stayed completely silent while Viktor became more and more exasperated.
For about 30 seconds that is. Eventually I called out and saved his wife’s life.
“Why didn’t you say anything earlier?” Viktor screamed, in tears.
“Well, I guess now you know how lateness can really hurt someone’s feelings.” He was never late again.
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